He that is good with a hammer … 11/22/2014

This is probably one of my all time favorite quotes. 

I’m paraphrasing a bit here, but it goes like this: 

“He that is good with a hammer tends to see everything as a nail.” 

This is attributed to Abraham Maslow, a groundbreaking American psychologist. 

And what this quote means to me is to not overly focus on one way of doing something, especially if you ( or I) are particularly good at it. 

This is especially true when trying to hypnotize, influence and persuade people. 

Many times I’ll watch someone try to convince someone else of something, only to watch them crash and burn. 

It’s not pretty. 

And many times this can be attributed to not meeting someone where they are at. 

Let me give you an example. 

Let’s say that you’re helping a friend look for a new job. And so you get a great lead and actually set up an interview for them. 

You find out the next week that they didn’t even show up for the interview. 

What happened? 

You thought they were serious about getting a new job and took the step of finding them an interview, but they … weren’t. 

Maybe they were ready to send out some resumes, or make some phone calls, or talk to their friends, etc. 

But they weren’t ready to sit down face to face with someone and actually interview for a new job. 

You were at step C, but they were only on step A. 

Two different pages. 

How do you avoid this? 

Ask (what may seem like) obvious questions. 

For example, you could ask your friend “When you say you’re looking for a new job, what does that mean to you?” 

That way you can zero in on exactly what they mean. 

There’s a story that I heard years ago about a man going up to one of the Disneyworld employees and asking “What time does the 3:00pm parade start?” 

On the surface it may seem like a really dumb question. 

3:00 pm of course. 

But the Disney customer experience is priority number one for the company, so the Disney employee took the question seriously, and looked beyond the words of the customer to the actual meaning that the customer was trying to express. 

What the customer really wanted to know was not what time the parade started (which is what he asked) but what time the 3:00 pm parade would pass by the location where the customer was so that he and his family could get a good spot to watch the parade. 

Big difference. 

But if you’re willing to take the extra time to see beyond the words and try to understand what someone actually means when they ask you a question or make a statement, it will go a long way towards building a relationship. 

Which always increases your ability to hypnotize, influence and persuade anyone. 

If you’d like to improve your ability to ask better questions, or establish rapport quickly with someone, or even create an environment where people open up to you easily and effortlessly, then check out theHypnotic Hacks ebook

I Cover all of these things and more and discuss some of the best ways to hypnotize, influence and persuade people without coming across as obnoxious or overbearing. You can look at short video that I made here

Until next time, have a great day! 


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